Silence Forgotten

Today is the day I started walking for exactly one mile. It rained a cold fall rain reminiscence of Halloween tide. My GP doctor tells me if I do not begin to take care of my health, I will be dead within the next twenty years.  Hearing this makes me pensively contemplate my life so far and how so much of what I want from life has not happened yet. In the silent melancholy of lonely late nights I feel like life fizzles out as I live and breath and I've come to a crossroads.  If I go right, I die perhaps not outliving my kitten Salem. If I go left great things are in store for me but whatever happens, I can not go on as I have before, ignoring my true voice, the one that speaks from my very soul.

As I walked today, I chattered excitedly to myself (after all many hours of solitude have made me an avid self talker).  I was excited about the new experiences I am having by finding parks in my vicinity, parks where I have never gone before and finding places for my soul to convene with nature. You see I have a new nifty application on my phone that lets me look up walking trails in my area and track the speed and amount of walking I accomplish.  But in my chattering thrill of new adventure I figuratively kicked myself when I realized the one thing I had forgotten was silence. Silence?  Silence is golden so the proverb says but I am not silent near enough of the time. It is like the rattle of my brain cells compels me to roar away chattering always chattering, when sometimes in the convening with nature I could find my soul if I could learn to still the chattering of my mind and actually hear and feel what nature is trying to tell me.  Birds fly away when I walk down the nice cement path because unlike a bobcat in the woods I can not silently pass. I need to cultivate silence, not that I don't think or pray but just listen, listen to what the Earth mother is trying to tell  me as I strengthen my body.  Silence....shhh! Be still and know that I am.